Yester years, revisited

I would like to say that I could see KL today because the haze has finally cleared up but I couldn’t because the city has once again gone AWOL. Is the haze back again? I couldn’t tell. I hope not. It certainly doesn’t smell like it.

Anyway, I have some bad news. My final year roommate at UTP, Tomok is warded at the hospital. And it is almost certain he will miss this weekend’s convocation ceremony. Poor guy. I feel bad for him. I actually went with him to pick up his tailored suit recently. As it seems, it will continue to remain in his closet for the time being. Great things are supposed to happen this weekend. His absence will leave a bitter taste for everyone involved. He has a heart infection and from what I’ve heard, he’s going to be there for quite a while. Maybe months. I could only imagine his frustration and anguish. But it’s a good thing that he never lost his sense of humor, even in his current condition. The first words he said to me when I saw him at the hospital was, “futsal, futsal …” That was on a Friday, the day when we usually have our futsal outing. Well, I can only pray for him, give moral encouragement and wish him well.

To other news…

I made a trip down to memory lane yesterday. I went back to school. Yes, the Alma Mater. SAS. Well, it wasn’t a full on nostalgic trip because it resides at its new location at Putrajaya now. Nevertheless, there were still some familiar looking teachers around. Although none of them remembered my name or which batch I was with but they instinctively knew I am an ex-boy. Kinda weird, isn’t it? I guess there’s some aura that ex-boys project whenever they return to the school compound that’s easily identifiable by the teachers. Anyway the new school looks incredibly organized and proper. Sadly though, I could only see so many geek-looking kids compared to the cool ones. But some things never change. You see, I had a definite objective returning to school. I was looking to add a SAS tie clip to my ensemble. A touch of nostalgic. But, as the same during my heydays, the co-op only opens when they want to open it. And yesterday was a day when decided NOT to open it. Unlucky me. So many years on and my own school still find ways to disappoint me.

Tomorrow will be the trip back to Tronoh. Nearly a cool 8 months after I kiss its sorry ass goodbye. But somehow it feels sort of strange. I’m half excited and half, resentment, I suppose? Part of me says, “Oh yeah, it’s gonna a whole lotta fun!” and a part of it just goes, “Ha? Tronoh again ah?” But one thing I do hope though is to see Siti Nabilah again. Oh yes, Siti Nabilah. She has a boyfriend but who cares? Just a glimpse would be enough to make me happy. I wonder why am I so obsessed with her? Probably because she represents this unattainable height of fantasy for me. A girl that is out of my league, as I once confessed. She represents hope. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never.

I wonder what I’ll be looking forward to come Monday, once the epitome has passed. And I still haven’t answered the love or money question. Oh decisions, decisions…