Thursday, September 20, 2007

The Departure of Mr Mourinho

Most of yesterday (Wednesday) was spent trying to figure out the case analysis that I was supposed to present today (Thursday) and a lengthy discussion with my managerial accounting lecturer. Then, it was business economics class. 3 hours of exchange rates, its determinants and the difference between flexible and fixed. By 10, I made my way to Ampang to attend Cipoi’s house warming BBQ party. Just a small crowd of less than 10. Enjoying grilled food. It started since 7 but they were nice enough to prolong the event just for my sake. Besides, it was me and Pidot who went to Carrefour Tuesday afternoon getting our hands on 20 pieces of lamb chops and 4 packets of hot dogs. Anyway, I had a quick bite of 2 chops and a burger. And they were surprisingly good. Just don’t tell Watai. But maybe also the fact that I got them right off the grill. Anyway, I was pretty much the last customer and we packed things up soon after. But since it was hardly 11 and BBQ does kind of leave you dehydrated, off to Pelita Ampang. But it was filled to the brim. It was even worse than the usual weekend crowd. We decided it just wasn’t worth the effort so we just hitched to Nasi Lemak Pandan by the corner of CIMB. Some space. A relief! So a round of teh ‘o’s and air suam, conversation were pretty much around the hot lady who just dropped by to bungkus some nasi lemak, Entourage and Chanel.

We called it a night just before 1. I got home and guess what? It’s Champions League night. Second round of Matchday 1. I watched the preview show but as expected, just about 10 minutes into the Sporting vs MU match, I slumped to dreamland. It was probably around 2 something. I woke up about 4.45 am, realizing ‘Damnit, I did it again!’ and managed to catch the post-match show of Richard Keys, Ruud Gullit, Jamie Redknapp and Graeme Souness. That was until my mother summoned me for sahur. Of course, I had mine on front of the TV.

Show ended about 6 and I have a group meeting at 10, and I still haven’t done my part yet. At this point my body is practically shouting for a rest, so what can I do? I surrendered myself to it. But for only up to 8.30 cause I need to take a bath and do a super quick presentation draft of my part. In an hour, I managed to produce 20 comprehensive slides. I was quite pleased with myself. Not bad for a drowsy, semi-conscious bloke.

With much laziness, I started up Jane and drove to UIA. Bemoaning that my day was just starting and I was not in an acceptable physical condition (as if I ever had one before), I switched on the radio to Hitz and then came the news snippet.

‘Chelsea has confirmed that Jose Mourinho has parted company with mutual consent’


I knew my judgment was incredibly suspect at the time but I know what I heard. And it was the most heart-wrenching football news since Italy lost to South Korea in the 2002 World Cup. And even now, while I’m writing this, it still hasn’t sunk in. Mourinho no more? Shit, like, I love the guy! He brought the first Premiership title to Chelsea in 50 years. And it got worse when they appointed Avram Grant to take over first team affairs. Who the hell is this guy? Get Cappello for crying out loud! Not to mention we’re going to Old Trafford this weekend. Yes, the future suddenly look very bleak for Chelsea fans. This was not the kind of news I'd like to get on the day of my presentation.

My presentation went kinda well, by the way. Considering I’ve been walking around with a half lifeless body. Occasionally without realizing, softly chanting ‘Jose Mourinho, Jose Mourinho, Jose Mourinho, Jose Mourinho’ to myself.

I better get some sleep. I got a paper due noon tomorrow.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

A Phone Call To Keira

To mark her 2Xth birthday, I decided to give Eiwa a call the other day. (I tried Aritha first but since I only got her voice mail, I thought maybe she turned her phone off to do some naughty stuff. I guess it’d be rude to intrude and left it at that. Well, wouldn’t you like to celebrate your birthday by doing naughty stuff? I know I would) And also since I have yet to talk to her in 2007 I think it’ll also serve as a nice gesture, don’t you think? Anyway, I was quite nervous since I don’t know how the conversation is going to be like. It has been THAT long, y’see. Maybe something weird or awkward would ensue but surprisingly no. It actually felt good. It felt like catching up with an old friend. And I also found out that she had lost her phone earlier this year and with it my phone number which would explain why I hadn’t heard anything from her all this while. Well, guess that’s poor marks for me for not giving HER a call once in a while. Twat.

And another thing, it still amazes me that I haven’t taken her out for that drink that I made her promised me ages ago. Even then and there. Well, not really then and there since she was at Genting at the time having fun with her girlfriends and all but if I had wanted to, I could have. Because during that brief conversation I did create value. I read from a dating expert somewhere (probably from and he said that in order to create interest from the female, you have to first create value for yourself. Best example would be from Hitch in that Grey Goose Martini scene. Just when you started to get sucked in by the conversation, Will Smith goes by saying, ‘Well, it was nice talking to you Sara Melas,’ and just left. And the martinis came and Eva Mendes was left giggling. And I think I managed that. She did sound giggly at the end of the call. Or it could’ve been the high altitude.

Anyway, by the end of the call, it reminds me of how good it felt to have nice talk with a decent girl. That hasn’t happened to me for a while. The only conversation I have with a female these days is with Deb, and she swears more than any other boys I know. She’s the kind of girl that when you question her sexuality, she would grab her boobs and shout ‘Then what the fuck do you call these?’ Well it wasn’t us who claims she wants to be ‘one of the boys’. It was entirely her call. Which would explain why it is weird to see her wear a baju kurung when she attends weddings. By the day, she gets more and more like her idol Catherine Tate (check out BBC Entertainment, Astro CH26). So, it was very refreshing to come across a Keira Knightly once in a while. And it even beats a Courtney Love (Tita) episode too. Nice and charming at first then rude and loud the next. There’s also a bit of Tara Reid inside there too. And not really in a good way.

I think I should work something out with Keira here. It wouldn’t hurt, I’d give you that. More so since Ms Anna Kournikova (Jes) has since gone back to Sarawak. Not that I regularly go out with her but knowing that she’d be at Westin gives me a comfortable feeling. Like if all else fails, then hey, at least we can drop by at Jes’. I wish she had stayed there forever. Well, no more of that now.

As for Ms. U, well, I think a congratulations is in order. For those of you who couldn’t guess who am I referring to, let’s just say that Ms U is name that we do not speak of here at It’s A Guy Thing. It’s a thin line between love and hate and I learnt that the hard way. So, no, I don’t a need a revision course. As for Ms W, since her name has the same phonetics, I’d rather not take the risk of writing her name either. But she does has an incredibly sexy voice. Slightly sultry and her English is as smooth as silk. And I do get turned on by smooth English talking girls. Why do you think I like Keira so much? The real one that is. But it’s no surprise since the current MBA programme she’s taking is her 2nd Masters degree. Yikes! As for Mirsya, well, I’d save that for another time. And if we’re lucky, I’ll include a photo as well, and you’ll see what I mean by the Sharifah Amani look-alike. ‘Til then, folks.

Donat yang Bulat

I’d say of one of the fringe benefits of having a sister-in-law who is working as a flight attendant is that once in a while she would smuggle something nice from her trips and bring them home for the enjoyment of her unemployed brother-in-law. Like this morning my breakfast consists of gourmet sandwiches. Those little buns with slices of roast chicken inside them that only looks dry but comes bursting with flavour? Yep, those kind. I’m such a lucky bastard. Last week she took some mixed nuts packets that were reserved for 1st class passengers. I didn’t fancy them too much but it did trigger an early gout warning in my father’s toe. Needless to say, that was the last time he touched them. A couple of weeks back she brought home a big box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts all the way from London. She said she’s addicted to them and all her stewardesses friends so she thought she brought home some. And also because she has a fun time every time she goes through customs and on the X-ray monitors ‘nanti nampak bulat bulat bulat,’ and the officers would have that ‘what the fuck…?’ look on their faces. To me they were nothing really special. They’re good but not really mind-blowing. No variety and they’re all heavily sugar frosted which makes you hardly like to taste more than one piece. But she said that Carrefour recently have beginning to sell them too so you are welcome to try them yourself and have your on opinion about them. But to me, Big Apple at the Curve is still serve the most seductive doughnuts in town.

And It Was a Green Day

One of my motivations for writing this post after an overdue absence is so that Ridhu would have one taunt less when we go head to head during Winning 11 11 at Machiko’s. He would start ranting on something and then suddenly. ‘Dahla tak update blog!’ Yes, he’s a confessed regular and yes, it was totally uncalled for and although not exactly hurting, the chance to eliminate such jibes in future situations just seems… preferable.

Anyway, here we are. Post wedding day. Post reunion day. Post Last Hurrah for Jes at Genting day. Post Baby Jane’s return day. And post having the kitchen renovated. Actually that’s not post. It’s still on going. At one time I had this gaping hole on the side of my house. Needless to say, my mother had some pretty worrying nights as she constantly felt that we were so incredibly prone to house robbery those nights that at any time burglars would easily enter and ransack our house, steal the TV, ruin her decorative ornaments and shave the cats bald. None of those happened, of course. I, for one, refuse to be fearful in my own neighbourhood let alone within the compound of our house. Besides, I stay up late pretty much every night and if some shit do takes place, I’d be the first to know. So far, as I came home at around 3 or 4 in the morning on certain occasions, things are cool. No worries there.

As for the kitchen, well, I don’t know how exactly it’s going to look like when it’s finished but I do know we’re gonna have yellow kitchen cabinets. And if I’m not further mistaken, my father is having a Koi pond built around the house somewhere. Well, that’ll amuse Hobbes. Hobbes is my cat, by the way. Classic tabby. Weighs almost 3 kgs. Extremely lazy and an obvious fat ass but something tells me bright colored fishes would attract any cat’s attention no matter how physically passive they are.

Should I talk about the wedding? I should, shouldn’t I? Man, this what happens when you don’t blog after a while. An accumulation of blog-worthy things that’s left unwritten. And to totally discard those stories would be…unethical. Damn these management courses! I’m beginning to use words like ‘unethical’ to communicate myself in an unprofessional context.

Anyway, my brother’s wedding…what can I say? It was beautiful. Everything was so green. It was their theme. And having it at FRIM does help, I think. I was the designated driver for the couple. I was the one who drove them from Kak Chaya’s house to FRIM. Of course, almost nobody knew about this as the best man takes all the credit while I had to park the car in an already packed area.

Sasa, Sarah and Izzu came which was nice. No one from SAS came so that pretty sums up how they can be such fuckholes at times but Machiko did made an effort to came so I guess that entitles him to an exception. And yet, he still finds joy in beating my 5-0 twice in 1 day. Twice! I mean, I’m a seasoned Win 11 player like he is but damnit! I tell ya, Rooney is evil.

Anyway, back to the wedding. I kicked ass for my speech. Oh yes, I probably didn’t mention this but a few days before W-Day (get it? Yes, I know it’s lame) my mother told me that I have to give a speech on behalf of the family in welcoming my new sister-in-law. She will prepare it for me, of course, but a speech? Y’all kiddin’ me? Oh thank you for the head’s up. What did I do to deserve such pressure? Same shit when I was designated to become the MC for the Scuds reunion dinner. But, as always, I pulled through. Unfortunately though, no one was to give the plaudits. Because, y’see, the kenduri is an open affair. Meaning anyone would come whenever they want within the stipulated time, have their meal, meet some relatives, take some pictures with the bride and groom and leave. So, it’s not exactly a formal function where everyone is seated at their tables and conversations are turned into whispers. No. This one was like a traditional kenduri. It was riuh, so to speak. So was the case when I went to the podium. Even my mother missed it. She was like, ‘You’re done with the speech?’ and I was like, ‘Yeah, about a half hour ago’. Only when the AV people compiled everything and made this edited DVD of the wedding day that people could finally embrace my awesomeness. I don’t know if they were patronizing me but credit is always welcome, how overdue it may be. And of course, Project Folklore received the same fate. Fully enjoyed only by the closest family members. My grandmother loved my speech. Aren’t they great? Even if you suck, they always say nice things to you.

That’s basically it actually. Truth is, that event took place more than a month ago so the buzz is pretty much gone. Which would explain my lack of enthusiasm. And we have yet to go into reunion day. Or that day at Genting. Or Mrs ‘U’, who is expecting. Or Mrs ‘W’, who isn’t but has one hell of a sexy voice. Or Mirsya, the Indonesian who looks like Sharifah Amani with a headscarf. One of my main motivations to come to class every Monday and Thursday. And Eiwa is somehow still my guilty pleasure. Other people has chocolates but mine has tits and if memory has anything to go by, a very delectable ass. How on earth does this feel guilty!?

If you see any wedding photos in this post, chances are they are added later. Cheers.

Oh yeah, Jane’s back. Took a while but she’s back. No more problems ever since. I so rock.