He's Just Not That Into You

It annoys me immensely when a woman asks me this question “Cemane nak tau kalau laki tu suka kat kite ke tak?”
Oh bloody fuckin’ please.
You know, it’s fortunate for the girls who asked me this that I’m not the type who gave out harsh and discerning responses rather bluntly. A ‘Simon Cowell treatment ’ as you might call it. The initial thought that occurs to me is that, girl, he’s not that into you. It’s as simple as that. But I know these girls wouldn’t accept those kind of answers. They always look for that ‘underlying meaning’. As if there’s any to begin with. Men are simple minded creatures. We don’t watch Oprah and don’t have a whole section devoted to our literary preferences in bookstores marked ‘Guy Lit’. So after giving them the “Oh brother,” look I gave a calm and resolute response. “Well, I don’t personally know the guy who you are referring to so I wouldn’t know what constitutes or not constitutes as a subtle inclinations of the male subject having any romanticizing thoughts about you.” Throwing the ball back into their park. Let them dwell on the thought for a minute or two. Then I excused myself. I don’t talk to women to discuss about other guys. What’s the point in that? Even guys don’t talk about guys. It’s a classic case of girl like boy but boy is ignorant (which is normal) and unintentionally sending out the wrong messages (stupid but still normal). Should the girl manages somehow to hook the boy, then, whoa, it’s not going to be exactly ‘happily ever after’ kind of fairytale ending. Some of my friends are on that bandwagon and do you know how they react before they answer their phones when the word ‘sayang’ flashes on the LCD screen? They gave out a groan. Sometimes a loud one, sometimes soft, depends on the circumstances but a groan nevertheless. Questions like “Mane?” are the usual issues. You see these girls are so desperate to hang on to their men that they haggle them constantly almost suffocating them. They think that by keeping them on a short leash would serve them better. But this plan would only backfire, sooner or later. Whoa, I’m getting way ahead of myself here.

Anyway, I’d wish women would stop asking me these stupid questions. If you don’t know whether he likes you or not chances are he doesn’t. Move on and let’s change the subject. Good God this is not a topic for weekends.